Archive for January, 2010

Returning home from combat is not as easy as many expect. Thinking of home feels wonderful, a safe and comfortable place, where things will “sort themselves out”. Many veterans can’t wait to get on the plane and head home, and neither can their relatives.
But it is important to recognize that just the physical change to leave for safer grounds doesn’t make the experiences, the combat stress, the often upsetting, overwhelming and traumatic memories, undone.
In the days, weeks or months after returning home from combat, many veterans report that the world seems to stand still, as if in slow motion. They still have the adrenaline rush going, and the very thing that often protected their lives, being able to always be alert and on guard, and ready to protect themselves and others, is now working against them.
In the beginning, this might feel like a normal adjustment period that can be expected after such a high adrenaline life in theater, but after a while, it often becomes clearer and clearer that the inner pressure, the hyper vigilance, the inner arousal fro combat stress doesn’t go away on its own. The high tempo in which the world seems to unfold for these men and women often causes conflicts with the rest of the family, who don’t understand or have difficulty coping with the changes they see in their soldier returning home from combat.
With EFT, we might have an opportunity to help a Veteran “de-stress”, lowering the inner pressure that the soldier feels, and helping him or her to relax.

Here are some tapping suggestions. You must read and agree to the disclaimer on this site to continue. Free EFT tapping chart.
Even though I feel like I’m going a hundred miles an hour, I deeply and completely accept that I’m safe now.
Even though I feel like things are going SO SLOW now, I choose to allow myself to remember what it felt like to be safe before I left
Even though I can’t stand the boring life right now, I need the kick and adrenaline rush, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway
TH: I can’t stand how slow things are going now!
IE: It is SO SLOW!
OE: Wake up people, you have to move a little faster!!!
UE: I can’t stand how SLOW this “outside world” is now
UN: I feel so much pressure inside, I HAVE to do something!
UL: There is so much pressure, and I just don’t feel safe to relax
CB: So much pressure inside
UA: I miss the action of combat so much
TH:Even though I know I should feel safe now, I miss the action

IE: I can choose to find a way to safely lower that inner pressure one step at a time
OE: I can choose to allow myself to realize that I am safe and so is my family
UE: I can choose to know exactly when I need to feel vigilant, and when I can relax
UN: And to realize that I will never loose my survivor skills that I have trained so hard to get
UL: I can choose to allow my system to remember its normal inner pace
CB: That I had before I left and that is good for me and the life I live now
UA: I can choose to allow myself to take a breath and release the excess adrenaline
TH: so that I can begin to claim my normal life back, one step at a time.

IE: I love how comfortable it is to relax
OE: I can actually take a breath and let some of this stres go!
UE: I love how easy and appropriate it can feel to know when I am safe and when I’m not
UN: And to trust that my training will always be there for me when I truly need it to survive
UL: But when I am safe and don’t hae to expect any danger
CB: I can allow myself to relax and enjoy
UA: I am so grateful that I can relax step by step
TH: Knowing with certainty when I am safe, and when I truly need my training.

Just see how this resonates with you, and change the wording to what works best for you.
Most of the Veterans I have coached with EFT after returning home from combat told me that they never needed their training again in civilian life, and that it was just their adrenaline that kept them going, not the reality of a present danger.

Dear Ingrid,

Thank You very much for the session we had this evening. To say it was enlightening would be an understatement.

So many traumas in my life were hit on, I am amazed. Even now, half and hour after we hung up the phone, things are popping up in my mind and I have the ability to see them from a different point of view, a different acceptance level. I couldn’t tell you when the last time in my life was when I was this relaxed.

It will take some time for this new person to show to others in this house the difference in me because of the ongoing tension that is here. I know that when others see how I am acting and showing feelings they will wonder what has happened.

We spoke of the black hole in my heart and tapped on it until the hole closed. I can look back now and say that this black hole was actually bigger than the quarter I stated during our session. It was only at that point that I realized it was actually showing itself to me. I also understand it was the 9 yr old little boy who made it shown as a gesture of asking for help for the “rest of the problems” to be accepted and finally closed off. I never expected that 9 year old to surface like he did and in such a matter of fact way.

Our session showed to me that traumatic stressors come in many ways in our life and the way we react is because of the way we have been brought up and told how to handle things. Mostly, we are told “NOT” to react and just accept for acceptances sake and go on. We are never told how to act and react and go through the emotions that are attached to the situations.

In my situation, we started the session working on my left rotator cup problems. Quickly things changed to dealing with anger. First anger toward my rotator cup, then to my home problems. Then when least expected, to anger over losing my mother when I was 9 years old.

As that anger was targeted, there was suddenly this “black hole” in my heart that was visible. Only a quarter in size showing, I know it must have been much larger in the beginning, possibly larger than the heart itself(much larger). This black hole contained many angers towards many people and many situations I had never been taught how to deal with and understand. We tapped on these people and situations until the hole shrank and I was calmer. Then we tapped some more and some more until the black hole closed completely and I was totally calm and even chuckling some.

As our session came to a close, I realized that I could look back on my mother’s death and no longer have an overwhelming feeling of loss. I could look back and give help and protection to that 9 year old now that I know what is was all about with my mother. Now, if he reaches out I will be there for him.

I was able to look back at situations like a movie in which I was in the middle but also I was outside looking in without those emotions again. I could be watching and be detached at the same time. I never in a million years did I think I could look back on my own mother’s death and other situations and feel detached and calm. I am so calm while typing this and normally by now I would be in tears and upset to the max.

I have even had some flashbacks of personal situations that happened while I was in the military. This session showed me that past situations whether they be military or civilian, can be seen and handled in a different manner.

We tried more tapping on my shoulder until an impasse was hit. My arm would not move further without severe pain. It had improved even though not the outcome fully wanted. It was decided to go no further and let the doctors do what they do best..

I would be more than willing to talk to anyone and tell how different I felt before and after our session. I hope this testimonial has enough in it for you.

As I said before we hung up the phone, “I HUMBLY AND GRATEFULLY THANK YOU INGRID!”

Jim

(609) 479-6054

sign up: ingrid@eft4vets.com

Helping Veterans and their families heal requires more than EFT skills.

Working with the Military is in many ways different from any other community. Understanding how to create rapport and trust, the true meaning of the Warrior’s path, specific issues to address, and what not to talk about, and very creative and innovative approaches to EFT is essential for successful work.

On February 27th/28th 2010, I offer a two day EFT4Vets intensive, to help prepare Veterans and their families, and those who wish to help them, understand and prepare for this  important work.

Where: the Radisson Hotel in Nashua, NH (just over the Mass. border).

When: February 27th-28th 2010

Time: 9:00am-5:00pm

Cost: $279.- ($249.- early sign up before February 1st)

Included: An extensive manual, Certificate of Completion

sign up: ingrid@eft4vets.com

Here is the full description:

In this EFT4Vets 2 day workshop, attendees will learn how to use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) skillfully and successfully with returning Veterans and their families.
EFT has been showing very convincing, positive and lasting results even for the
release of severe combat trauma.
Read the Research results!
Watch the EFT for Combat Veterans video on the home page for a demonstration!
But helping Veterans and their families heal from the trauma of war often requires
much more than just an effective tool to releasing past trauma.
To truly understand how we can help a Soldier heal, we need to know more about the archetypal "warrior" and the spiritual and historical meaning of war as a rite of passage and initiation.
We need to understand the specific circumstances of different wars, and the meaning behind the stories that the Veterans might want to only touch on.
The Veterans Community is in many ways very different from "the outside world", and having insights about the unique needs and background can make all the difference for their healing.
Some of the topics that will be covered in this seminar are:
- Research and discussion about the situation of returning Veterans
- The archetype of the "Warrior"
- War as a rite of passage and initiation
- Establishing Trust and Rapport
- Introducing EFT concepts to Veterans
- How to begin with EFT
- Discussion of specific issues that need to be addressed
- Insights into war specific trauma
- Practice of different gentle EFT approaches, including making the right choices
- Reframing of traumatic memories
- Spiritual discussion of forgiveness
- Childhood issues in the context of war
- Discussion of issues that often occur together
- Proper goal setting for a session
- The legal and ethical boundaries of this work for licensed/non-licensed practitioners
- Several hours of demonstration and practice
- Insights into the situation of the families
- Helping family members heal with EFT
- Outlook into the Future
- Several hours of demonstration and practice

sign up :ingrid@eft4vets.com